Syrup

I'm so fucking easy

I have to be

Anything for the dopamine

Serotonin, adrenaline 

Anything for the thrill 

Of being alive

To convince me that I am alive

Any dumb sentence

Turns into a pill for me

That crush into dust and sniff in

Or inject in my veins 

An intravenous sort of medicine

That kills me as much as keep me here

I could count the endless methods

List my go-to' s

Expect you to pity me

But instead I'll try to put some words

On a page

And hope for them to hug me while I sleep

I have dark plans,

Foggy thoughts, deep wishes

I'm scared of dreaming

And of being awake

No one will get it,

I'm a fraud

An echo of myself

Someone I never met

Or mean to